Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Our Chute Doc: Lists, Giraffes, and the Mafia

Let the Chute Doc heal your wounds with a light hearted look at the world of cycling. A play on the word "chute", French for fall or crash, used a lot in cycling, and also an anagram of Tour de Couch. (This section was formerly known as That's So Couch.)

In the tradition of cycling's affinity for the mafia, Matti Breschel goes to the mattresses.

However, Breschel's boss Oleg Tinkov soon expressed his dismay. "When guys are on the mattresses they're not earning," he was heard to shout. But in his usually confusing way, where he also says the opposite, he tweeted "You give Sky a message - I want Froome...if not, it's all out war - we go to the mattresses."

PDAs of the fortnight with the people riders love the most:

Trek's Eugenio Alafici thought a bow tie would distract from the pinstripe tights. At least he recognises the new kit's formal attire function:

Team Sky riders covet thy neighbour's bikes, even before their bikes were stolen. 

After spotting more vision of Froome attacking on a bicycle at the Tour of Oman - when vision was actually available - animal welfare groups expressed fear it would also be seen by a certain Danish zoo:

George Hincapie's new hotel, the House of the Rising Sun, was the venue for Bicycling Magazine's 2014 #edchoice, where some of the Bicycling guys and gals got together to choose their fave best cycling stuff in a relaxed environment - and eat good food.
 Bill also tweeted this insight into George Hincapie:
which is probably summed up best:
Is it just me or has there been a plethora of "lists" of late in the cycling meeja? I don't need to provide a link as there has been at least one out there in the ether daily. Perhaps they stumbled on to this cool tool: - go on, type "kittel hair" in it, or, "cycling websites".

10 things the UCI should spend 3 million Swiss francs on instead of the big fat waste of time that will be the CIRC:
  1. Start up a fund to develop new managers, cycling doctors, DSs, soigneurs, etc so we can get rid of ALL the dodgy ones
  2. A PR campaign to get ballsy and promote cycling's reputation - i.e. it is a lot better than a lot of other sports in terms of doping - for example, where's the outrage about this lot then?
  3. Own Sagan for almost a year, to do, you know, whatever
  4. A fund to pay bloggers from far away lands to go to the Classics
  5. Pay the IOC to put the individual pursuit back in the games
  6. Pay the ASO to shorten boring long sprint stages in the TDF
  7. Pour the funds into women's pro cycling. 
  8. Pour the funds into women's pro cycling. 
  9. Pour the funds into women's pro cycling. 
  10. Pour the funds into women's pro cycling.

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