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Friday, March 5, 2010

That's so couch - 5th March 2010

Cycling Weekly: name change? and the Siege of Harfleur

For some reason, some of us still hold out hope Cycling Weekly aims to bring us cycling coverage from the world.  It'll just be easier for all involved if they change their name to Roleur Brittania or something equally spiffing, maybe even Argyle News (which covers their references to all things Garmin-Transitions and David Millar).  In this week's CW: 
NEWS
Team Sky toast Juan Antonio Flecha’s Het Nieuwsblad victory
Bradley Wiggins looking good at Ruta del Sol
Who’s in the 2010 Tour Series?

FEATURE
We join British team Endura at the Tour du Haut Var
Their Tweets weren't as bad.  This morning I counted that out of 16 tweets, 10 were about something British or Garmin.  Here's some of them (direct quotes, I'm not couching it up):

"Russell Downing 8th and Ian Wilkinson 10th in Tour of Murcia"
"Wiggins finishes in the main bunch"

Here's the couchiest one I found last week though:

“Cavendish and Wiggins battle through rainstorms in Andalusia.”

Reminds me of:
Once more unto the breach dear friends…..
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother
Except this whole blood brothers thing does not extend to the relationships between Lionel Birnie and Wiggins or at this stage Wiggins and Millar.

Graeme goes bananas over Robbie - the other one

After finishing second, a second day in a row, and to another Robbie, it was all too much for 2009 Murcia double stage winner Graeme Brown, so he did what he does best – mouthed off– even lodging a complaint. Now I haven't yet seen footage of the final sprint, so he could be innocent. Until that is proven, I'm going with the Robbie Hunter version of events and agreeing with his advice about where to ride in a sprint:



Spirited Robbie, but crazy?  Is riding your bike at a commissaire crazy?  Let's hear from the man himself, as reported in AAP 13 Jan 2010? "Just to be in the right position to start your sprint you've got to go bananas...you've got to flick the switch, flick the brain off and go for it."   Surely Graeme, Robbie, Robbie, Baden and the commissaire can't be wrong?

A sprinter and a gentleman

But Robbie Hunter doesn’t get away from the couch treatment this week either. He’d been moaning all day about how long it took him to get to the land of frites and mayo, so to feel better he wished somebody else a comfortable journey home:



 
New segment - Lance-a-lot-a-lot AKA why follow him on Twitter or read about him in any of the cycling publications, if you can get it all here in one convenient place:

- LA travelled to Valencia (that's in Spain he tells us) for JB’s son’s baptism.  He posted a pic with this caption:

"a good place for a baptism”

and here's the pic:


Unconfirmed sources say the service was not only conducted in Latin and Spanish but a long lost dialect from that shitty little town that that skinny little kid never leaves (so JB couldn't interpret) and JB junior was not baptised into the Lord but instead the priest said: “there can be only one rider….you are baptised unto the cycling LORD, Alberto Contador…you shall not worship Lance nor shop at The Shack”

- Some cycling publications also ran the story in the last few days that Lance's current focus is just the time trial.  How is that news? He's been posting pics to his twitter account and so on for weeks now about focusing on the time trial.  Are...they..merely...increasing...traffic...by..mentioning...Lance? Or was it a ploy by Lance in case he finishes well down the GC at Murcia?  And because other GC contenders for the Tour such as Cadel, Alberto and Mick Rogers and Levi have all RACED well thus far - oh yeah, and can time trial, would he cover his arse by saying "My number one priority isn’t cycling."  Glad he got off the couch then to show Sastre how to ride.

On the buses – AKA Mine’s bigger than yours


The Shack

Alternate uses: picking up the kids and the missus from the airport.  


BMC

Alternate uses: mobile sewing factory for Hincapie's clothing range.


 Team Sky

(team sky website)

Alternate uses: for plotting The Empire's return to its former glory.  Colonials welcome again for the fight.  First stop, Argentina.

Couchiest quote:  this comment was left on Lance's twitpic after posting the picture of The Shack bus:

"That bus just isn't as cool when you actually have to work for Radioshack." (@katyjo81)

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